Submitted by the Rev. Cara Scriven*

I write with a heavy heart.  Earlier in the week, the Conference debated whether Paul’s statement “nothing can separate us from the love of God” was accurate.  And then today, we not only voted not to be inclusive but we also would not affirm a statement that said we disagreed.

Eleven years ago, I chose to be United Methodist.  I have come to love this church, our theology, and the people.  And today, my heart breaks.  My heart breaks for the church, for those who have been excluded.  And while, I should be writing my sermon this morning, the words of the psalmist are all I have:

How long? How long, O Lord?
How long before we as a church will unite as the body of Christ?
How long before we accept you created us all?
How long will you hide your Spirit from us?
How long will we be left to our own reasons,
Our own petitions,
Our own desires?

How long do we have to wait?
How long will my heart break?
How long will your creation be continually hurt?
Daily?
Another year?
Another decade?
How long, O Lord?
How long will we disagree?

Lord God, look at me!
Look at us!  We cry out!
Answer us!
Give us sight to our eyes!
Help us see the moving of the Spirit!
Help us to see the Hope,
The hope of Jesus,
The hope of Resurrection.

Otherwise,
I will give up.
I will leave the church.
I will create the division.
And I will choose death.

And my friends,
My colleagues,
Your beautiful creation,
With whom I disagree,
Will say,
“We have won!”
and rejoice over my downfall.

And yet,
I still trust in you, O Lord.
I rejoice in your salvation,
In the hope of resurrection.
And I will sing your praises,
All the days of my life.

Amen.

*The Rev. Cara Scriven is pastor at Redmond United Methodist Church in Redmond, Washington.

Photo of artwork taken at General Conference 2012 on Thursday, May 3, 2012 by Patrick Scriven.

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10 COMMENTS

  6. Where, dear friends in Christ, do we start the new church? Let me know and I will be there.

    I, too, have a heavy heart. How appropriate the words of the Psalmist.

    How long, oh Lord.

    Indeed, how long until the old guard is replaced with inclusiveness?

    I pray
    I continue to pray
    I will be welcome in the Eposcopal church.

    Jerry, bring an application.

  8. I have been so down, so disappointed in the United Methodist Church, so discouraged. Your words are the cries of my heart. I find myself looking to the Episcopalians, the Presbyterians, the ELCA Lutherans who have opened their hearts and doors……when, or when, will we?

  9. Thank you all for your comments. I don’t know the answer to the “when” question. Traditionally, laments were used to motivate God to do something. I pray we might follow this tradition allowing our hearts and souls to cry out to God. May our cries be heard and may God’s Holy Spirit move in us and in our church so change may come.

  10. We all accept that God created us all – liberals and conservatives also accept this. Genesis says so. So I don’t understand when you say: “How long before we accept you created us all? The best studies for determining why there are homosexuals is the twin studies. The science has a surprising conclusion – for everyone. (Whitehead, 2011)

    Whitehead, N. E., (2011), “Neither Genes nor Choice:”, Retrieved May 18, 2012 from: http://www.mygenes.co.nz/whitehead_twinjhs.pdf

    (from the parent web site:

    Whitehead, N. E. & B., (2012), “Homosexuality and the scientific evidence”, Retrieved May 13, 2012 from: http://www.mygenes.co.nz/)

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